The lure of fantasy football...my trail of tears...

In 1996, a friend of mine, who I like to call "Mr. Rocket Scientist", was rather exuberant in insisting that I, a super football fan, simply had to try this fantasy football thing. He insisted that because we were both Lions fans, the Detroit Lions were ruining the game of football for us and that fantasy football provided a reason to get excited and watch other games besides the weekly Lions trouncing.

I believe that I should now refer to my friend no longer as "Mr. Rocket Scientist," but more correctly as "The Devil."

First of all, I'd like to make it clear that same stated friend has not played a season with yours truly in the last thirteen years...he's just left me to my own maniacal obsessions, while he has gone on to PhD's and world travel. He's like my genius crack dealing friend....

So now, here I am fifteen years later and still trying to stop this stupid obsession with rushing touchdowns and the next great "sleeper."

Fantasy football is degrading on many levels. Besides showing everyone that their belief that they know a little about football is completely false, it also is kind enough to tell you that you don't really have any friends.

Every year somebody asks me to start a league and then I have to start a long hard struggle to fill the league with enough players to make it viable. And then all of a sudden, nobody is interested in playing.

I can not tell you how many "Just join the league please" emails I've had to send. "Seriously dude, just join up and forget about it, I need to get the last slot filled..."

And god forbid you end up with an odd number of players...

Or CNNSI or Yahoo or whoever you're doing the free service through won't allow somebody into your league or you can't find the the League or three people who have apparently been in a drunken coma for the three weeks you've been recruiting show up on the day of the draft and want to get in. Three people...never four...Anything to get you back to an odd number.

And then there are all of the fantasy football sites that want to "fill you in" on the latest news and theories. How you have to draft a RB in the first round, how Peyton Manning is due to have a down year, this is the year Brett Favre finally gets hurt, running backs typically fall off when they hit the age of 30, Barry Sanders doesn't score enough touchdowns...It's a huge cacophony of noise and besides you know that your opinion is just as good as those talking bobbleheads, right?

This is how I once talked somebody into drafting the Arizona defense with the third overall pick one year.

So every year I say this is the year....this is the year I'm done with it.

Who wants to play?

The Legion of Doom

I think Matt Moore could be a sleeper this year...What round do you think I should draft Jahvid Best? I'm not sure...What are they saying on ESPN?

The Devil who wears #4's favorite cheerleader.